Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Madison Day

I hadn't been up to see Mom for awhile, so yesterday I drove up to the city.

On my way in, I took care of some errands. At Home Depot I checked on foam core board (for blocking shawl). It looked perfect, but I realized it was too big to fit in the car - will have to go back with the truck. Staples is right next door, so I picked up some paper for the printer and a receipt book (just in case I decide to give the Argyle craft fair a shot). Goodwill is next to that, so I took a fast cruise through, but didn't find anything that grabbed me.

I still had 50 minutes until it was time to meet Mom, so I stopped off at the Wisconsin Craft Mart. I like to keep tabs on what they have in knitting yarn. It's mostly basic acrylics and novelty yarns, but they do carry Kroy sock yarn, which is uncommon, and Paton's Classic Wool. On impulse I bought a funny little tool called a Straw Weaver, which I doubt I will ever use, but what the heck it was only $3.00. I was half looking for a hairpin lace tool, but surprisingly they didn't have one of those.

Went next door to Hancock Fabrics. They did have the hairpin lace thingy, but it was $13.00 and I decided I wasn't that curious. Found a shawl pin for $2.00 and picked that up. Then headed on to Mom's apartment.

After lunch we went for a walk, then Mom wanted to talk finances and final arrangements. Bless her, she wants everything to be in order and well understood before any final illness/sudden death. So we went over her Health Care Power of Attorney, changes she is making to her living trust, what she wants at her funeral, insurance policies. Of course, it wasn't the first time we had gone over all of these, and it won't be the last. It is exactly the sort of thing she should be doing, and it is also extremely stressful for me.

Part of the stress is her determination that it is important to leave some kind of inheritance to my brother and sister and me, coupled with her underlying conviction that doing so is more than likely to cause dissention among us. I don't know if this conviction is based on her observation of our characters or on one of the many articles she clips and saves. She is a great reader and a great worrier, on a wide variety of topics.

Came home and helped a friend move a dresser, then vegged out in front of the TV.


CatBookMom said...

Discussing End of Life matters is always stressful. Fortunately my mom had prepared documents with her wishes, probably due to nagging from my aunt Flo, Mom's older sister, who died of cancer about 10 years ago. DH and I have also discussed this for ourselves, and have some documents in place.

Sounds like you had a very good trip and a good visit. Happy day!

kmkat said...

I'm perusing your archives. The end of life thing can be stressful, so much so that some people never think about it. My mother, bless her heart, had everything organized for me. My husband's mother, curse her forever, refused to a, believe her husband was really dead, 2, recognize that she was fast becoming both physically and mentally unable to care for herself, and C, accept any help. I became her executor by default; what a headache. Kudos to you and your mom for choosing the wiser path.